Erin's Journals

Welcome to Friday. It’s felt like a month at times, but we’ve made it to the end of the week. And it’s been one with plenty of highs to match some of the hardest lows (like yesterday’s Kavanaugh hearings). I’d like to share with you a couple of them.
 
I got a special tweet on Wednesday. After he or she read my journal about the wisdom of being who you’re meant to be, @childoftheuniv5 sent me a screen grab of a tweet that he or she said made him or her think of me. Thank you for this: in it are the words above from Vancouver Fire Chief Darrell Reid.
 
I retweeted it and wrote to him asking if those were his words and he responded: “I tweeted this while mulling over a eulogy I’m writing. I noticed things I wanted to say about my friend were about him as a good man who lived and loved (eulogy things) not about him as a successful professional (résumé things). I doubt it’s a new idea, but it was how I felt.”
 
It’s sometimes amazing the wonderful wisdom that just awaits you with the click of a mouse or the opening of a site. But on Tuesday night I had to laugh when I stumbled upon this on Facebook. I belong to a local buy and sell site and I can tell you in all honesty that I’ve never seen an ad like this. And I almost guarantee that you haven’t either.
 
It reminded me right off the bat of a chapter in ad genius Terry O’Reilly’s book about marketing called This I Know: Marketing Lessons from Under the Influence (the latter part being the name of his CBC podcast). Among the many memorable stories is one that illustrates the power of story telling when it comes to sellling.
 
Terry shares the tale of a marketing magazine’s experiment: buy a bunch of seemingly useless trinkets (a toy hammer, a picture frame shaped like a flip-flop, an old rusty meat thermometer) and write a story about them that would compel eBay shoppers to overpay. And did they! A bidding war ensued that saw a tiny beaten up hammer go for over $70. You really have to read the book to get the story. But it speaks to the value in touching people’s hearts and just how powerful that can be.
 
That’s what came to mind when I saw this on our local site the other night. 
 

 
I wrote to Ben asking, “Is this your writing?” and he said that his wife would attest that this did come from his own mind. This guy’s writing makes me not only want to buy that stove (not that I have any use for one) but to take him out for a cold one later. How could you not love someone with that kind of sense of humour?
 
By the way, the stove sold that night, he found someone to help him take it off his truck on the other end, and I became a big fan of Level Headed Home Services. I don’t know if Ben and his team are any good but I sure would enjoy the time they spent in our house!
 
Take good care and have a terrific first (full) weekend of Fall. My dad and sister arrived from Kelowna on Wednesday and we’ve been having a great time ever since; I’ll share some stories with you here on Monday. Thanks for coming by!
 

Thank you so much for your birthday wishes yesterday. I am humbled and touched by your kindness.
 
I thought today, since I am entertaining my dad and younger sister from Kelowna, I’d borrow from the upcoming book Mourning Has Broken: Love, Loss and Reclaiming Joy (due out Feb. 26 2019 HarperCollins). Why? Because it’s a memory of my favourite birthday. And it happened six years ago yesterday. I’ll be back tomorrow to wrap up the week with you with just about the funniest ad I’ve ever read – from a local buy and sell site. You’ll love it. 
 
Meantime, I hope you enjoy this bit of the book.

One of my fondest memories will always be the day of my 50th birthday. Even though the three of us had spent my 40th in New York City dining at the iconic Rainbow Room in 30 Rockefeller Center on a rare night that there were tables open to the public, dancing to a live orchestra and enjoying one of the finest views and meals we would ever have, it was the homemade surprise she gave me a decade later that will always be at the very top of my list of my life’s favourite moments.
 
Rob and I had planned a small get-together with our friends from our years with a rock tribute band (I sang, played keyboards and sax; Rob played bass). About twenty of us in all were going to gather at our cottage north of the city to enjoy a casual dinner and birthday cake and to make some music. In the late afternoon, with an hour to go before the first guests were to arrive, the doorbell rang. I immediately went into panic mode. A towel on my head, I’d been finishing up some last minute kitchen chores so I hadn’t dried my hair and was definitely not ready for company!
 
I went to the door, Rob right behind me, and when I opened it, I couldn’t believe my eyes: it was Lauren, who had come all the way from Ottawa! She and her dad had planned it all: she caught a small plane to the downtown Toronto waterfront, took a cab several blocks to our condo, got the car key that awaited her at the front desk and then drove our car an hour up to the cottage to surprise me.
 
I stood there at the front door and, like a scene out of I Love Lucy, I just bawled. In fact, yes, I’m quite sure “WAAAaaaaaaah…” was the sound that came out. Ugly cry and all, it was simply the best surprise, the best birthday ever. She stayed just that one night and sang and made music with our friends who had known her since she was a baby, when she’d sleep peacefully in a playpen in an adjoining bedroom as we worked out the harmonies and chords on rock hits for a few hours each week. Growing up around them, she forged close ties with our bandmates and even got an extra grandmother out of the deal. As delighted as everyone was with this surprise visit, I still regard it as a gift I’ll always cherish. It was also the last of my birthdays we marked together. If it had to be our final one, I’m grateful it truly was the best. 

First of all, I want you to join me in wishing Olivia Newton-John a happy 70th birthday. As you probably read recently, she’s fighting a new battle with cancer. If anyone can win, it’s Olivia. Please send love. I’ve always remembered her birthday because I happen to share it. Oh, and statistically? This is the most common birthdate on the planet. I’m afraid my parents were just a bit predictable….
 
Here’s a favourite picture from last year when I had a chance to meet Olivia, along with my friend Amy Sky and Beth Nielsen-Chapman in Tacoma, WA. They have compiled an album of songs about death, strength, coping, recovery and hope called Liv On and the opening track, “My Heart Goes Out to You,” was inspired by Lauren’s passing. So it was a special meeting. Again, my best wishes to Olivia – such a special lady on her 70th birthday. Lots of Love, Liv. xox
 

 
Another amazing woman who is truly one of a kind turns 81 years old in December, and there’s a documentary about her that I am so looking forward to seeing. What I love most about her is her take on life and that’s what we get to experience in Jane Fonda: In Five Acts, which just became available this past Monday on HBO. You can click on the photo below to watch the trailer.
 

 

 
Jane Fonda appeared recently on The View and I had to stop the PVR and write down her words. Since I happen to be marking another trip around the sun today, the issue of aging has been a little more top of mind than usual. (My stance is to do it as gracefully as I can, get help when and where possible and to live my remaining years – hopefully plenty of ’em, as I’m just 56 – in a way that would both honour Lauren and maybe delight/bug the hell out of Rob.) 
 
There are people who still just despise Jane Fonda and she is most apologetic for some of the misguided things she has said and done. About others, she is still proud and I respect her for her convictions. So she was asked about the documentary and what she hopes people will come away with, what realizations they’ll have. Here’s her response and I just LOVE it:

I don’t care what they understand about me. What I hope they take away from the movie is, it’s never too late to become who you were meant to be. Live an examined life. Keep saying, Can I get better? Can I learn more? Can I grow? Is this a situation that can move me forward? If not? Leave. Keep moving. I know it’s not always easy – ’cause I’m white and I’m privileged and it’s easy for me to say – but I wish that I had seen a movie like this when I was younger, ’cause I maybe wouldn’t have made the mistakes I made.
 
That’s another thing: own it. Take responsibility for your mistakes. Learn from them or you can’t grow.

Jane went on to add that late blooming is advantageous, in that we live so long (her awakening seems to have come in her 70s when she says she realized she didn’t have to make her life all about pleasing men and meeting their expectations). 
 
I just loved the message behind what she had to say. “It’s never too late to become who you’re meant to be.” What a wonderful way of looking at things! I took it to heart because, like so many, I’m in the process of a rebirth. Things I never thought possible (for reasons I cannot have imagined) are on the precipice of becoming reality. Doors that I did not even know were there are beginning to open.
 
And it’s a wonderful thing. I will not grouse or complain – not often, anyway – about aging. Every cellulite bump, every sag, every unwanted hair (even the invisible one from your chin that threatens to catch in your airplane seatbelt) has been accompanied by a lesson or a little bit of wisdom. 
 
At least, that’s what I hope. Have a lovely day and I’ll be back with you tomorrow.
 

You’ve seen ads like these. They are everywhere. 
 

 
And it’s not just Marilyn Denis. It’s Tracy Moore. It’s Dina Pugliese. It’s Michele Romanow.
 
I spoke with Michele about it just last week and she said it comes with the territory: unscrupulous people making up ads just to get unwitting readers to click through and find out why their favourite personalities are in trouble or have quit or are going to start up a cosmetics line.
 
It’s nothing but lies. Out and out LIES. And I am furious on behalf of these women. When I first saw the Marilyn story, I knew that it was bogus. After all, she was (at the time) gearing up for another season of her hit CTV show and there was absolutely no chance she was leaving.
 
Then another ad started showing up and it was photoshopped to look as if she had a black eye. And then more ads, like the ones you see above. All of them different but all with the same message: she’s leaving TV and here’s why. “Fans are shocked!” the garbage click bait says. I know if it was about me, I’d be jumping out of my skin. But there is very little, if anything, these women or the companies that employ them can do.
 
When I tweeted about Marilyn NOT leaving, and wondering why @BellMediaPR wasn’t doing anything about it, they kindly responded to my tweet:
 

 
Last week I got an email from Marilyn thanking me for being such a staunch defender on her behalf. (No problem – I’d want people on my side if I had a profile big enough to be hit with these kinds of lies.) I tweeted about it a month or so ago but thought the lies had died down.
 
Then, just this past week, I was talking with a woman in Regina and she remarked that Marilyn sure had some changes coming (like I’d undertaken in my life and career). I asked her to clarify and, sure enough, she believed one of those stories, as told after clicking the shocking so-called headline. So the misinformation is still out there.
 
On the weekend, I spotted a tweet directed to Kevin Frankish that said, “Oh no, Kevin – first you leave (Breakfast Television) and now Dina?” followed by many crying emojis. So I wrote that it’s a hoax and a lie and none of the prominent women being targetted by these bogus posts is leaving. I added that, whatever you do, don’t click through to find out why they’re alleged to be departing their posts. 
 
Please share this blog with everyone you know – or at least my FB post – as we try to get a little bit of a truth bomb out there. I know people love to throw around the term “Fake News,” but that has come to mean (at least to me) truth that the reader finds distasteful. And I always hear it in Trump’s voice. Ugh. In this case, it’s outright fraud and lies. That’s not even fake news. It’s a crime, is what it is.
 
And why can’t they stop it, all of these high profile media company’s lawyers? Because you can’t hit a moving target, that’s why. That’s what Michele Romanow (CBC’s Dragons’ Den) told me: the IP addresses – usually based in China – are constantly changing.
 
It’s nearly impossible to nail these bastards. As Michele put it with a shrug, “I just hate people wasting their money on these products.” She’s right. In her case, the ads suggest that Michele left DD because she found this amazing product through her show and wanted to endorse/make money from it. Same song for Marilyn, Tracy, Dina and more. It’s a sham and a scam and I need you to help me share the truth.
 
I know I have hated being lied about in the past – albeit not on as nearly wide a platform – and that’s why I’m so indignant on behalf of these women. 
 
(By the way, if you ever hear any rumours about me or have any questions, you need only write and ask. It gives me a chance to answer them honestly. Like the one last week assuming I’d quit radio to write a book. Stuff like that. Let me give you a head start, though: I am definitely having an affair with George Clooney, but Rob’s okay with it as long as we’re discreet and it doesn’t interfere with his hockey. There.) Talk to you here tomorrow.
 

My thoughts – and yours, too, I’m sure – are with the people of the Ottawa region who were hit so hard by two tornadoes on Friday. As I write this, Phil, Brooke and Colin are safe and cozy at home in one of the areas affected by the storms, but are in Day 3 without power. That’s a lot of wasted food, I’m afraid. And they’re without WiFi, too, which Brooke tells me is the hardest part.
 
But they’re safe – that’s the best news. I hope that all of my Ottawa friends and acquaintances, a few of whom I saw in Regina with CREA last week, are also faring as well as one can after such a devastating series of weather events.
 
Travel can bring the best and worst out in people. That’s no stark, revelatory statement; just talk to anyone who flies a lot and they’ll tell you horror stories, pet peeves and tales to make you vow to keep your feet on the ground.
 
I learned something on a recent flight and that knowledge just added to my increasing ire. I ended up landing in lovely Victoria in a rather foul mood. I’m sure Rob thought it was him, although how could you be angry with someone who buys you dahlias when you’ve only been gone for 32 hours? (I definitely should have taken the Dalai Lama’s words to heart.)
 

 
While flying home from Regina on Thursday afternoon (and this was the view out the window of our small Air Canada plane)….
 

 
…my seatmate and I were offered drinks. As he paid for his wine with a credit card, I asked our flight attendant if airlines would ever allow payment by Tap. In case you’re not familiar, Tap is a method I use constantly. You load your credit card info into your phone and then, provided the purchase is under $100, you simply hold your thumb to your ID button, put your phone near the payment device and, just like that, you’ve paid. I love it and thank Michelle Butterly from CHFI for teaching me how to use it! (She’s always been way ahead of me on the app curve.) 
 
The answer to my question about getting Tap was “probably not.” It would mean installing cellular components on the plane just for that (this plane most definitely was not equipped for anything except getting off the ground, staying in the air, and landing safely). The equipment is said to be quite heavy and a small plane like this couldn’t handle it.
 
Also, she informed us that cellular signals on a plane can interfere with the pilots’ communication. She told us of a flight recently where, before landing, a passenger turned on his phone and was having a conversation which was actually picked up BY THE FLIGHT CREW up front. Yes, the pilot/co-pilot could hear the man’s phone conversation. Our flight attendant told us that they had considered making an announcement, but didn’t – not sure why.
 
Wow. It actually interferes with the communications between pilots and the tower. I mean, I assumed that, but this is serious.
 
I heard a passenger on another flight lament that “she has it in for you, dude” after being told twice to switch his phone into airplane mode. I was a bit incredulous: some people act like they’ve never been on a plane before or didn’t hear the announcement that it was time to switch off phones, etc.. Completely oblivious. For some reason, they think it’s some vast conspiracy to prevent them personally from having any fun and, obviously, the rules don’t apply to them. So they ignore them.
 
That was exactly the case with the man seated next to me on the blessedly short hop from Vancouver to Victoria Thursday afternoon. Dressed in a sharp suit and wing tip shoes, he had a neatly cropped beard and looked all business. Clearly he was important (!) as he had to be told by the flight attendant to put his phone on airplane mode. So he did. Then about two minutes later, he turned it on again and started texting.
 
Okay, I thought, we haven’t taken off yet; he’s just finishing up. Nope. He turned his phone on and texted at least ten more times in the course of our short flight.
 
I just wonder what it is that makes people think rules aren’t for them. The ones who blow through stop signs or think standing in line is for losers. Maybe it’s time the airlines were a little more graphic in the reason for their rules about turning off our phones. One article I read recently suggests that as many as 40 percent of air travellers don’t turn off their phones during flights.
 
I don’t care to die just because buddy next to me has to keep up a conversation with someone (and no, I’m not that much of a Gladys Kravitz that I was peering over to see what this important exchange was all about). 
 
But I don’t want his selfishness to affect my – and everyone else’s – safety. Is that so wrong?