Erin's Journals

Just a thought… Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. [Roger Caras]

Ah, Election Day. I said it before and I’ll say it again – thank goodness our campaign cycle is weeks and not years like our neighbours to the south. I’ve got to say I had a sick feeling when I read online that a crowd was chanting “Lock Him Up! Lock Him Up!” at a campaign gathering on the weekend.

Shall we add a nice Canadian “u” and spell it deplourable? Because yelling about throwing someone in jail – that’s what we do when we don’t like a political rival now? Not in Canada it isn’t. Take that MAGA BS and stick it south of the border. (The chant was later changed to “vote him out.” But still….)

I’ll stick with a theme of gratitude: for the right to vote (which was bestowed upon most – but not all – Canadian women with the declaration of “personhood” just 90 years ago last Friday), the freedom of democracy, having a strong voice and hopefully returning to some form of civility after the votes are tallied tonight. I’m not so optimistic as I once was about a movement away from anger and hatred among some Canadians after today, but…we can hope.

I’m also grateful to have seen this in the weekend Globe and Mail (free for a limited time online BTW)… 

Still hanging in for the year at #10, Mourning Has Broken, I’m told, is #4 among Canadian writers for non-fiction for 2019. To say that I’m thrilled about it is an understatement. I’d give my life not to have written it, but if our story and experiences can help others, then they lend all of this some kind of positive meaning: something in which to find that precious gratitude.

Today I’ll end with a short video of a very special fur baby in our lives. On Saturday, Molly turned 15 years old and we can’t get over how much energy and life she has in her.

A Lhasa-Apso/Japanese Chin cross, I have no idea what her life expectancy is, but when you see this video, you’ll understand if we think she’s got a lot of fuel left in the tank, despite a few health problems.

Her joints and agility are like that of a much younger dog and to that I attribute her daily Leaps and Bounds chewy treat from SierraSil, a product which I joyfully and gratefully still use and endorse (you can click the link to learn more).

Molly’s “brother” Pepper lived a full life of 17-and-a-half years, but he sure didn’t move like this little girl; we sprinkled capsules (ours) over his food so he could still make the jump up to the bed, but Molly is literally leaps and bounds beyond where our sweet boy was at this age.

Interestingly, her appetite has grown over the past year (and so has her waistline) but a bit of extra weight doesn’t seem to be slowing her down at all. Of course, we do see some signs of old age: she’s losing her hearing and she sleeps a lot, mostly on our bed and often between Rob and me.

There’s a special sweet comfort that comes with falling asleep, one hand resting on a softly breathing family member. Rob might prefer it be him instead, but Molly positions herself so that she gets cuddles from both of us.

Happy 15th Birthday, Molly! 

Now, enjoy this video shot halfway through(!) a long walk last week and picked up when we returned home about 20 minutes later. Click the photo below to watch the video.

I’ll be back with you here on Thursday, writing once again from an Ontario time zone. My poor confused computer – and body clock! First stop: a big night of inspiration for The Light House for Grieving Children in Burlington, featuring a woman who personally knows tragedy and author of Resilience, FedEx Canada boss Lisa Lisson and me.

Click here for more information and maybe we’ll see you Wednesday night or at another event this trip.

Just a thought… Staying positive does not mean that things will be okay. Rather it is knowing that you will be okay no matter how things turn out. [author unknown]

I SO miss writing here every day. I’m out on walks and thinking of 17 different things to journal about, but now that I’ve curtailed my posts to two a week, it’s hard to narrow things down!

Luckily, I can post on my public Facebook page daily to share some thoughts (usually quotes that I hope will help with your day) but sometimes I just have more to get out of me – if that makes sense?

When we were with Mike Cooper at his place last week, we shot a short video where we talked about next October’s AMA Waterways river cruise.

Even if joining us (either on the boat next year or in Yorkville for a get-together on November 4) isn’t in your plans – and I get that it’s not for everyone – enjoy this fun and laughter-filled conversation. Click the photo below if you’d like to watch it.

Details on the party and the cruise are within the video and I’ll tell you that the man Gerry that we mention is a no-pressure kind of guy and he’ll be heading up the gathering. If you want to come, please email Gerry so he has some idea of numbers. Come by for a hug and hello and we’ll go from there, okay?

I shot another short video, but I’ll wait to share with you next week: Molly’s turning 15 very soon and I couldn’t resist shooting a bit of her on a walk. This dog is energy personified (perdogified?) and she amazes me every day. I think it’ll bring you some joy, especially on a Monday morning. And look, we all need that these days.

My heart has been so heavy of late with the news from south of the border and around the world, as well as the vitriol and divisiveness that has permeated our current election cycle. Trying to stay positive about anything these days is a challenge, especially when we’ve been hit by a rainy week here in the Victoria area.

Yes, I practise what I preach with meditation, yin yoga and getting together with friends on a shared path of recovery, but like everyone, I have my blue days. I’m just a little weary of it all.

I don’t know about you, but my best remedy is focussing on the day ahead and getting busy doing what I love: tonight I put on the lashes again and head out to emcee opening night of the Sidney Fine Arts Show. I will have the pleasure of interviewing a woman who has in her possession – and shares via a book and shows – exclusive Gerry Dieter photos of John and Yoko’s 1969 Bed In for Peace in Montreal. Should be fascinating!

Then tomorrow evening, I’m honoured to be taking part in a reading at Sidney LitFest – a celebration of books and authors. I love digging into life here in our new community: there’s one more event (a speech for BC retirees) next week before we head east again for a series of speeches and talks, so we’ve got a busy month ahead before shutting it all down for the winter.

Thanks for coming along for the ride and enjoy your weekend.

Just a thought… Words are free. It’s how you use them that may cost you. [KushandWizdom]

Welcome to a brand new, shortened week as we embark on the second half of October! It’s hard to believe that we’ll soon be seeing poppies and wreaths, enjoying Christmas decorations and hearing ads with bells in the background.

This year seems to be just steamrolling by, but I guess that’ll happen when you spend six weeks of your summer in a treatment centre in what was probably the most productive and meaningful period of time I have ever spent on myself.

So, did you and yours have a turkey dinner? We did – sort of! Still just hovering above our lives before we head east again – fitting in appointments, trying to stay on top of things – we accepted our friends’ offer to have “Thanksgiving lite” and ordered pizzas with a theme to fit the day! Here’s the ad from a very creative shop not far from us…

Cool, huh? Talk about thinking “out of the box” – literally – I mean, this place has a pulled pork and bacon pizza called the Notorious P.I.G.! Then there’s the P.I.G. Mac (which combines the Notorious P.I.G. with mac ‘n’ cheese). I’d pass on the latter, but I just love their creativity alone. Thankfully, their food is pretty darned good, too.

A pizza with turkey, gravy sauce on its thick crust, local veggies and a bit of stuffing in there is surprisingly good; to my taste buds, it was similar to a turkey sandwich, only warm and with a nice layer of cheese (without the herb sprig seen in the picture; perhaps they ran out). Nothing replaces a good ol’ fashioned turkey dinner with all of the traditional side dishes, but paired with that super creamy squash soup and a salad, it made for a really neat meal. 

I have to admit that Rob and I were feeling a little proud of ourselves for having our suitcases unpacked (although his is open in another bedroom awaiting next week’s trip) and three loads of laundry done before 24 hours had passed since our landing at YYJ. It’s the small victories, right?

Our suitcases, however, are showing the strain of travel. One has a severe punt in the corner; the other’s expansion zipper is broken – the pull tab broke off somewhere between here and there. We found out from WestJet that you have to report the damage within 7 days (it had happened on our way east) so we’re out of luck. Just a word to the wise.

Oh, and I also had a fairly new NAOT shoe blow out its side seams halfway through the trip. It’s irreparable. Is the universe telling me to stay put? Maybe. Molly seems pretty nonchalant about the whole travel thing; she loves staying home with our friend and just runs the house as usual. 

Our time in Collingwood, where I emceed and then wrapped up a gathering of the Ontario Association of Cemetery and Funeral Professionals with my “Reclaiming Joy” keynote speech, was beyond wonderful.

I learned from, laughed and connected with hundreds of people and, while I found myself completely spent by the time we pointed our rental car towards YYZ, it made me realize that the path Rob and I are on of sharing our message of hope and how to deal with grief is the right one.

In just over a week we board another plane to Ontario for a number of charity events (and a few paid ones to make the trip fiscally possible) from Rotary International to Markham Stouffville Hospital, from The Lighthouse for Grieving Children to Heart House Hospice – with more stops in between – and I hope that if you’re interested, you’ll be able to attend one of the open talks. (See the What’s Up section on my home page if you want more information on how we can meet up.)

So here we are, you and I, ready to go for another week. What will it bring? I can guarantee you one thing: I will resume my promise not to comment on anything political in social media.

On Friday, I cavalierly commented on a post by a favourite cousin pertaining to a situation in her home province. When my intentions were misconstrued, I simmered and stewed all weekend fearing she was angry with me. Rob and I don’t have much family and I don’t want to alienate those people we love and who love us, so it hurt my heart to think that we had, however inadvertently. 

So the lesson to me as we get closer to next week’s election is just to keep my mouth shut (and fingers still) and remember, to paraphrase the words of the “Serenity Prayer,” to accept the things I cannot change, have the courage to change the things I can and seek the wisdom to know the difference.

I’ll make my voice heard by voting, as should we all. But my gosh, aren’t we lucky our federal campaigns run for weeks and not years? How much can anyone take?

Have a gentle few days and I’ll return here on Thursday with a short video Mike Cooper and I shot. It’s filled with laughter – something I think we can all use.

Just a thought… Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it inflames the great. [Roger de Bussy-Rabutin]

Welcome to Monday! I’m in a bit of an elated state, having spent the weekend in the company of our sweet little grand dude, Colin.

We celebrated his Oct. 11th fifth birthday early, going to an indoor play place called Fun Haven, visiting Build-a-Bear (where we watched him decide on the scent, sound and outfit for his newest friend, a bigger version of Paw Patrol‘s Chase).

Endless storybooks and cuddles, two trips to our favourite park to ride the bike that his Grandpa Kevin gifted him, and lots of other little adventures made the weekend simply unforgettable and one filled with firsts.

It’s hard to pick highlights, but there were two: Colin stayed with us for a night in our hotel room, and yesterday afternoon we saw a movie that brought us to a full circle moment in our lives.

I wrote about Toy Story 4 when it came out this summer: we wouldn’t be seeing it. The first three installments in this classic Pixar series were so interwoven with our little family that Rob and I didn’t see how our hearts could bear to watch a fourth movie without the girl who’d grown into a woman and cried with us in the theatre as we watched Andy Davis grow up and head off to college, just as she was doing the exact same thing.

When Colin said he wanted to dress as the cowboy Woody from Toy Story for Halloween, we were delighted at the coincidence. Then, against all odds, we found a small theatre in Ottawa that was showing the film (to be released tomorrow for DVD and download, if you’re interested).

The opportunity to take our little guy to a theatre for the first time for such a significant movie for Rob and me was irresistible. And so, on a rainy Sunday, off we went, hearts in our throats, to see if we could get an almost-five-year-old to sit still for over 90 minutes in a theatre. (Notice the poster to the right in this picture? I couldn’t resist including it….)

We had nothing to worry about. We gave Colin a comprehensive briefing over breakfast about whispering to us if he had questions, keeping his feet still, being sure to pee before the movie and promising to stay for the whole thing.

He enjoyed the story, jumped only once when something surprising happened on screen, and seemed to enjoy Grandad Banana’s laughing at so many of the film’s witty lines. We stayed not only through the wonderful end credits, but as we walked to the back of the empty theatre to let staff sweep up, he watched the screen as the hundreds of names scrolled up.

(We’re a big fan of credits and were glad we stayed when everyone else had left: there was one last gag over the PiXAR name at the end featuring the lovable Canadian motorcycle stunt rider, Duke Caboom.)

It was as the last strains of the score faded that my tears began, a now-uncharacteristic release of emotions that had built up since we first began screwing up our courage to see just one more Toy Story movie. Who would have imagined it would be with our daughter’s son? And he was just so perfect.

After the film, as we tried to glean insight into his take on the whole movie experience, we asked what was his favourite part. His answer? “Woody and Buzz Lightyear.” Later, when he told his parents about the movie, the extent of his critique was, “I had popcorn!”

There were, as I say, almost too many moments crammed into our 31 hours of “just us” time to list the ones that shone most brightly. But through every single one, I kept reminding myself to imprint a picture in my heart so that I could try to hold on to it for the months we’re apart.

Luckily, we’re back in Ottawa during the final week of this month when another business trip brings us east, so the good-byes weren’t too hard this time. We’re counting ourselves lucky, as we so often try to do.

Later this week, I’m going to share with you our thoughts on sweet Baby Jane (with a gorgeous picture) and Colin’s reaction to his new sister. I know our daughter was very vocal about not wanting a sibling; would Colin feel the same? Once again, we needn’t have worried.

Today, I’ll be on CTV Ottawa to talk about Mourning Has Broken at about 8:40 am. I look forward to sharing the reaction to the book, so much of which I was blessed to experience last Thursday in London.

The day began with a new keynote address that I’ll also be giving this Thursday in Collingwood – one that was received with a standing ovation, laughter and tears – truly all I could hope for. That evening I was in the company of my friend Lisa Brandt as she interviewed me at a book signing at Chapters.

Today we head to Ennismore and the embrace of our dear friend (and now, fellow traveler) Mike Cooper. This trip is doing a year’s worth of good for my heart and both Rob and I are enjoying it all. (The backdrop of autumn colours sure doesn’t hurt, either!)

For now…happy trails. I’ll be back with you Thursday.