Erin's Journals

Just a thought… As sure as time, history is repeating itself and as sure as man is man, history is the last place he’ll look for his lessons. [Harper Lee]

I can’t even believe it’s only been a month today since we nervously caught our flight home to Canada from California. So much has…not changed. But tempers are simmering, with fuel being added to the fire by people who are absolutely ignorant to, and uncaring about, what opening everything again could cause in the not-so-long run.

If you’re like me, you’re watching with incredulity, loathing and, yes, some fear the people who are losing their nut about having to stay inside. The ones being egged on by their “leader” through and with the help of his main platform, the propaganda TV network that is champing at the bit to get everyone back out on the streets, onto transit and into crowded workplaces, before the virus has even peaked, in many places.

Of course, I’m referring to this round of the virus; the bigger world picture demonstrates that there will be another wave of it, if COVID-19 isn’t given a chance to die off, which is what SARS did in the early 2000s. 

Do we all want to stay in? Of course not! There are millions of people in this country and everywhere else who are desperately worried every day and night about how to pay their bills and feed their families. Our government’s efforts to help mitigate some of the financial pain is helping, but it can’t bring back businesses that will shut down, never to reopen.

There have already been lasting effects and we will see more for years to come. But don’t we owe it to others and ourselves to try to get life back to some semblance of normalcy by following the guidelines (and in some case orders) of those who have actual medical degrees and insight into how this new virus works?

The “just like the flu” and “I have my rights!” crowds seem unable or unwilling to understand that a virus that strikes your respiratory system as drastically as this one can has the capability of leaving you with lifelong lung problems.

This includes children and young people, so often pointed to as being more likely to be immune to or recover more easily from this disease. The detrimental after-effects could prove permanent. No, this is not the flu. Or car accidents. Or any other ridiculous false equivalency that we’ve been hearing from people with no more medical knowledge than I have.

But, you know, just like the folks who had to go to the beach on the long weekend in JAWS, they chose to ignore actual facts. Just as they have when it comes to climate change and anything else they don’t want to acknowledge or can barely understand.

They refuse to listen to history, as in the case of the Spanish Flu (which began in Kansas in the US, for what it’s worth) in 1918 – not 1917 as tRump keeps saying. When WWI ended, it was decided by some that, despite the deadly flu, people needed morale boosted in the form of big celebrations and parades. And guess what?

Those gregarious gatherings brought about an entire new round of devastation and death. There were three deadly waves of the Spanish Flu, which cost more lives than the Great War itself. More reading here.

My heart goes out to the health care workers who are going to put their own lives on the line to treat those patients who don’t take seriously the science that they’ll call upon to save their sorry souls.

I just wish they could sign one of these before they go to the beach, to the rallies and every other gathering.

We are seeing humanity at its absolute worst in our next-door neighbour and, if my Twitter feed yesterday is any indication, right here in Canada, too, where it appears that hatred for the prime minister or his party often supersedes any intelligent thought.

We can do our part and hope that those who choose not to, who would rather Live Free and Die, to mangle an American slogan, will stay home. Thankfully, a closed Canadian border will help keep out some of the stupidity.

Now let’s spread the message to the ones here who aren’t getting it – before they really get it, and keep this virus going on and on and on.

Because that’s how these work: you can’t pray it away, you can’t protest it until it skulks back to where it came from, you can’t get sick to “own the libs” (get back at the people you hate) or to show “Turdeau” (as the haters like to call him) who’s boss.

We fight together, we stay at home. We wait this out like the responsible adults we’re supposed to be and we listen to the advice of experts.

We can do this.

Just a thought… Self-care is giving the world the best of you, instead of what’s left of you. [Katie Reed]

Is anyone else having an awfully hard time sleeping these days? So much of it has to do with my busy brain: I come up with things to worry about, things about which I can do absolutely nothing!

I’ve stopped reading news on my iPhone before bed (which invariably gets my blood boiling) and I think the next step is stopping the late night talk shows. The humour in the monologues is just too infuriating; when they’re based on the endless stream of idiocy coming out of DC, the laughs aren’t there any more.

Although, here’s one: with the opening of beaches in Jacksonville, Florida, I had to laugh at a meme that said, “Having some states lock down and some states not lock down is like having a peeing section in a swimming pool.” It would be funnier if it wasn’t so deadly. 

So I remind myself to return to the “Serenity Prayer”:

As some of us find our tempers a little shorter than usual, our patience a bit harder to find, I am grateful to share this with you from a journal reader. She sent it about a month ago and its timing today is serendipitous. She writes:

I just read a post/story of why a Bear hibernates all winter long. This came from a young lady named Cheyenne Thomas… I have been feeling very caged in with isolation and social distancing, and my partner Joseph gave me a bear teaching:

When a bear goes into hibernation, they do it for the health of their community and themselves. In the winter, food is scarce, hibernating allows other animals to have access to the limited resources. It slows the spread of disease and viruses among other animals during a season when immune systems are lowered, and energy is limited.

It is also a time of conserving health for the bear, a time for reflection…it is a time that allows you to renew, to undergo change, to honour your place in life and food cycles.

It is not a time for anxiety or fear. When it is time for hibernation, a bear can finally relax. All of the stress of finding food, territory, and a mate disappears. The bear believes that they have done enough and trust in themselves. They know this process is necessary and they will come out the other side renewed.

Be the bear. Stay home. Rest. Know you are doing this for something much bigger than yourself.

I hope that this gentle, natural perspective helps make this time a little more bearable, if you will.

Take good care and I’ll be back here tomorrow. Sleep well.

Just a thought… Inspiration comes during work, not before it. [Madeleine L’Engle]

It’s funny how 24 hours can pass so slowly – or so quickly – depending on so much that goes outside of us, and within us. We mark our day with meals or the smallest of rituals that help us hold on to a semblance of normalcy. For some, that means sharing time here, and I’m grateful. It’s from you that I get my inspiration.

This connection here means more than my words can express, but I think I’ve tried often enough. So we’ll keep this 7-day-a-week journal going for as long as we need to. I pepper them with videos and light moments, and cherish the thought that we’re spending some time together, just you and I. And say a silent prayer each day that everyone we love stays safe.

Here in BC, we’ve been given an extraordinary gift in the person of one Dr. Bonnie Henry, who has been on this virus since January as our Provincial Health Officer.

A recent article about her told some of Dr. Henry’s backstory: former navy, she’s worked with the WHO on polio eradication and her history includes working in Uganda on an Ebola outbreak. Nearly two decades ago, she worked in Ontario where, after SARS, she talked with every family that had lost a member and knew the impact it had had on them. Imagine that.

Her BC Health predecessor calls her an “example of grace under pressure – of honesty, straight-forwardness, empathy and communication.” He goes on to say that he doesn’t think he’d have done the job as well as she’s doing. It is that care and expertise that she brings with her to shepherd us through these times. There’s even been a sweet ballad written in her honour. Thank you, Dr. Henry!

Even the shoe designer John Fluevog has saluted the good – no, great – doctor. If you’re not familiar with Fluevogs (which I was not until my friend Lisa Brandt expressed her great love for these unusual, Canadian-designed shoes) they’re unique designs that are like pieces of art on your feet and in your closet. I don’t have a pair, but Dr. Henry is a fan. And in her honour, Mr. Fluevog has done this.

I’m hoping that when all of this is over, Dr. Henry receives honours in the form of the Order of Canada and whatever laurels a grateful country and province can send her way. We bow at her feet, no matter what she has on them.

Here at home, my own designer, Rob, has been busy. Remember those extra pillowcases I was sent a year ago by Wayfair, by accident? (I’d ordered a few pair and got a few dozen instead.) The ones that we didn’t give away have been put to further good use: masks.

So proud was I of Rob’s handiwork that I sent the picture of his finished product to my friend Lori, a friend since our elementary school days in Trenton and Belleville, Ontario, who is now an Infection Control Practitioner in the Quinte region. See if you can spot what’s wrong with this picture. And “your roots are dark” is not an answer!

It doesn’t have a nose pinch! For a professional, this mask did not pass the smell (or breath) test. She suggested that, for some who are making their own masks, a plastic-coated twist tie (to prevent rust) is a good nose pincher, while I suppose if you had a nose clip for swimming, that would be super handy too!

Lori sent me an approved pattern of hers and if you’d like, I can forward it to you via email (erin@erindavis.com). But here are a few pics of some very well-made masks that Lori shared with me. They were made by a friend of hers named Bettina.

I understand from emails I received in response to yesterday’s journal and on FB that lots of individuals and groups have put their sewing machines to work for the cause. It’s still incredible that we are doing this now, but here we are. Might as well do it in style!

Have a gentle Friday and if this day ushers in a weekend off work for you, congratulations. YOU are appreciated and loved, and I can only hope you know that. Thank you for what you’re doing to keep us safe; the very least we can do is return the favour by caring enough not to spread this virus.

I’ll be back with you tomorrow.

Just a thought… One of the hardest things in life is letting go of what you thought was real. [attributed to numerous sources]

An update on Miss Molly: turns out, like most of us, she was just bored. I can’t blame her; she’s on a diet for her kidneys and she’s tired of the food. So we shook things up with a bit of egg and some rice, and she devoured it. So on we go…with a question.

What is the mask rule, anyway? (Don’t answer; it’s rhetorical.)

Before Rob went to the grocery store on Sunday, we scoured the house and garage for anything that even resembled a mask and came up empty. Instead, I gave him a linen scarf (a nice dark one, not flowery or anything) and asked him to be sure to wear it, up under his glasses and over his ears covering his cheeks and chin. He promised he would.

He didn’t.

Why? Because when he got into the grocery store, no one was wearing a mask or a scarf. Not a shopper, not a staffer, no one. So he felt really stupid, like he was “overreacting” by putting on a scarf and looking like a bandit.

I can’t blame him; avoiding being embarrassed is a strong motivator for me. And I can hear you yelling, “Getting a deadly virus is worse than being embarrassed!” so, yeah. You’re right. It’s a ridiculous response to a surreal situation and I don’t know why we’re so armed when we leave the house and then when we look around we go, “Huh. Maybe we’re over reacting….”

Well, it is that bad. And lackadaisical attitudes like that will get us – or others – sick. So, as of today: masks. No exceptions. We’re just going to wear them.

There’s this bizarre disconnect between what we read and know, and what we do. Call it cognitive dissonance if you like: the reason we do things even though we know they’re bad for us. (I’m kind of a queen of that.) However, we got this message from the neighborhood (yes, without a “u” in this case) association in Palm Springs.

That’s how serious California is; every place seems to have different rules, but trust Palm Springs to make their posters super artsy!

Speaking of masks, here’s something you’ll want to see. I happened to catch this on the Late Show with Stephen Colbert this week, and I wanted to share it with you. The lovely Matthew McConaughey shot a video to illustrate how to make a simple DIY mask. And although we don’t have bandanas, we do have any number of pieces of material left over from Rob’s sewing projects. So yes, we’re making masks.

Stay safe, stay sane and watch this video. It’s cool and helpful. And you’re going to want to share it with your loved ones…but tomorrow I’ll have pics of the ones Rob has made, plus some solid tips from a nurse pal of mine whose job it has been to supervise mask making and wearing, on what we need to do to make this more efficient. Talk to you then.

Just a thought…

Happiness is pretty simple:

Someone to Love.

Something to Do.

Something to Look Forward To.

[Rita Mae Brown]

These words have always resonated with me, and they still do. But I think part of the challenge that so many of us are feeling is that we’re having to visualize these things differently than we ever have before.

Someone to Love – that’s a big one. As we know, there are many of us who are not with the people we love, but for some it’s the gift of a furry family member; an animal that depends on us for sustenance in almost every way, something even a cat would grudgingly agree on!

Our Molly is not herself these days: she’s not eating, her walks are sluggish and she gets up and off the bed several times a night, which, of course, awakens us with concern. She’s having tummy troubles that are making themselves seen when she sits by the door to go outside far more frequently than usual. And we’re adjusting her diet to try to make things better.

For those we love who aren’t with us, we reach out, we click on our cameras, we even send cards, like this one I got from Cece in Ontario yesterday.

We were able to send an Edible Arrangement to our Ottawa family for Easter; they gave us the gift of video time. We’re all managing as best we can.

And for yet others, the someone they love is their god. I send special good wishes to our Sikh community, celebrating their holiest day of the year (Vaisakhi) this week, too. As we’ve all seen, we don’t have to have physical contact to feel that love and the strength that can come from faith. Even if it’s just in each other.

Something to Do For most of us, we are called upon to do the very least we can do, and that is nothing. It means staying in. Following rules. Doing our part by staying put. Small pockets of COVIDiots are forming and rising against government edicts.

The messages are mixed and many are wrong; we need to listen to the science and the experts. Not politicians or their entitled, nepotism-riddled spawn. Not internet activists tired of being told what to do by “the man.” Not people too stupid to vaccinate their children, who think that their kids should be able to play with each other. Listen. To. The. Experts.

Yes, the Something to Do is challenging, unless that “something” is evening snacking. Thank goodness my two bags of peanut M&Ms are gone. Well, not entirely gone: I’m up two pounds. I’m managing about 6000 steps a day and Rob and I talked about going for a bike ride to shake things up (quite literally) but I’m afraid that is not following the rules.

I just want to do what’s best for everyone. We’re not going out, except for Molly’s necessary walks, period. Overly cautious? Maybe. Or perhaps in a time of a deadly pandemic there is no such thing.

And finally, Something to Look Forward To.

Believe it or not – and maybe you can relate – I’m finding this to be the hardest part of all. How lucky we are not to have a big event like a wedding planned. Yes, there’s our reunion cruise in October, which may or may not be going ahead; everyone is keeping their perspective in check and we’re just watching and waiting.

I get emails like the one from Viola who has a new grandson this week that she can’t wait to hold and from Gilda whose son married last month in a socially-distanced ceremony. These stories abound: the disruptions, the cancelled plans, the disappointment. None compares to planning a funeral and that’s what we’re all trying to avoid. As someone said, “Take your pick: six feet apart or six feet under.” Sometimes these simple, harsh sayings make the point best.

Or you could be this guy, Mr. Noodle (a named I borrowed from a favourite visitor to Elmo’s World). Yeah. Don’t be that guy.

We’ve always managed, Rob and I, to keep up spirits up by staying busy and making plans. Rarely is there a month that doesn’t include some kind of visit to an airport; our calendar is always filled with things to take us out of ourselves. But here we are. Here we all are. The thing we’ll look forward to, without attaching a date or making a reservation (not for dinner, not for a flight and not even for a haircut) is some kind of brighter future.

“I live in the world that I have, not the world that I want,” Dr. Jonathan Reiner said on CNN yesterday. And that’s about the wisest thing I heard all day.

Have a gentle Wednesday and we’ll be back with you tomorrow. Thanks for being what I look forward to these days.